It's been a while...

I have been laser focused on my recovery more so than even before. However, in doing so I have gotten caught up in MYSELF. What do I mean when I say that... well instead of continuously seeking God, I sought after things that made me "happy." Which only made me more depressed. I was doing SO well and going SO hard after God for 2 months pretty much solid. I don't want to say I 'burnt out...' but I did. Why did I burn out? What causes a burn out like I experienced. The answer to these questions is.. I STOPPED BEING... AND STARTED DOING. There is NOTHING you CAN DO! TO BE a child of GOD>….we overanalyze (or I know I do) EVERYTHING. It's truly simple. The entire Bible lays it out for us. Heaven is REAL. God is REAL. His Spirit LIVES within US! He is not FAR away.. we are the ones putting the DISTANCE between HIM & US.

I have to make everything else that I put ABOVE HIM, below HIM in order to truly manifest the Presence of God. Going through this taper right now, as of the past week, has been challenging. Not only because I ran out of vitamins, but because I wasn't seeking HIM first. IN fact... I honestly sought Him last, if at all each day. Or if I sought Him first thing in the morning, I would sporadically incorporate Him into my day. I don't WANT that to be the way I live. It is NOT satisfying to live that way. I am tired of doing it MY way.. AGAIN. How can I STAY focused ON HIM!? You just have to START.. and NOT stop. Just like exercising, or any other hobby, or habit. I am going to challenge myself to SEEK GOD 100% for the next 30 days as I've NEVER sought after Him before. No more putting the old grave clothes, He left the grave behind. So WILL I!